The ##

Our favorite bit?

A hipster incorrectly employing the concept of irony: “’It was a tiny parade, and they shut down Graham Avenue?’ said Mr. Tocco, 26, an actor. ‘There was one float and a horrible marching band. It was very ironic. The Latino parades are more festive.’

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Hi Foster.

How many PBRs did you buy last night? Maybe ten or twelve? What about $250 million worth? That’s how much bro C. Dean Metropoulos bought! Wow, I wish I was partying with that guy!

The Wall Street Journal was nice enough to let us know of this massive transaction of Pabst, and even inform us that this so-called “PBR” stuff is a “beer of choice for a generation of irony-loving hipsters from Portland, Ore., to Manhattan’s Lower East Side.” That’s some crazy shit, Rupert!

But, um, investor guy—didn’t you know that PBR is so over? All the kids are on that Four Loko shit now. Or Icing each other from sun-up to sun-down. Just watch it happen—in a month or two you’ll see that Iron City will become the New PBR, and everyone will get their Bmore on and switch to drinking Natty Boh.

So, bad investment. Nice try, though!

I know pretty much nothing about Beerjacket, but I’ve fallen in love with this tender cover of “Dancing in the Dark,” which Rolling Stone summed up as “a few plucked chords and [a] timeless aching melody.” I guess that’s true, too.