The ##

Yesterday, at Harvard, a hawk ate a squirrel.

This seems like a fairly unusual occurrence — only at Harvard! — but it is NOT. Here at The ## HQ, we were witnesses to this very same exhibition of the life cycle almost two years ago, marked by the following leaked e-mail. All incriminating names and locations are redacted. This is based on a true story:

SPOTTED:

TODAY:

On the main quad in front of the [redacted] as the Chapel bells were
ringing:

A HAWK eating a SQUIRREL that it SLAYED with its TALONS.

This opera lasted 35 MINUTES.

Hundreds of people stopped to watch.

After the bones were picked, the HAWK flew away across the main quad and above  the [redacted].

Don’t tell ME that you’re hard. You’ve never seen hard.

Until you’ve seen a HAWK consuming a SQUIRREL.

Got it?