So this happened.
Driving out of the city last weekend, we heard “Stay Schemin’” four or five times before losing local rap radio. The song sort of plods in that setting because it’s long and the censoring robs the lyrical delivery of any gravitas while creating a lot of blank space in the hook. By the time the third verse comes around — the one by French Montana, who also sings the chorus — it feels like it’s been forever, but there’s one more special nugget, at around the 3:35 mark, in a couplet that references Jim Jarmusch.
Montana begins, “From the hoopty coupe to that Ghost, dog/ Pigeons on the roof like Ghost Dog,” but because of the way the snare hits fall, paired with his regional accent and enunciation, it sounds like he says, according to many on the internet, “Fanute the coupe…” He doesn’t — too few syllables — but the word (while not yet on Urban Dictionary) is taking on a life of its own, and has since been defined as to “get money,” or more generally, to do away with or swap. But that’s subject to change. I’ve been checking the term using Twitter’s search function for a few weeks now, and I keep waiting for Complex.com to write an explainer, but it hasn’t arrived yet.
Misheard lyrics might’ve once been an intimate experience resulting in a brief embarrassment among a small group (“one-winged dove,” for me) but now we’re sharing, giggling publicly, and innovating. French Montana could use another catchphrase.
One of the more ridiculous types of news that seems to be prevalent in society these days is celebrity image. There was a time when movie stars and models were just movie stars and models. People saw beautiful people in movies and in magazines, and that was about it. Now, however, it seems we can’t go ten seconds without being presented with pictures of celebrities on tv screens, in magazines, on billboards, and on computer advertisements. Really, it’s a bit maddening-– a lot of men will tell you that the next time they see a Justin Bieber ad or a Brad and Angelina magazine cover, they’re going to tear their hair out. The only problem with this is that it would give Bieber and Brad more advantages-– great heads of hair.
Sometimes it seems as if it would be best for people to calm down about celebrity beauty and style. There are people out there who go to great lengths to imitate not only general celebrity style, but even particular looks from individual people. Of course, the problem with this is that it is not exactly possible to exactly imitate gorgeous celebrities. After all, one of the reasons that these people are famous is that they are so uniquely beautiful. Not everyone looks like Mila Kunis or Megan Fox! Not to say that talent didn’t play a role in their getting where they got in life— but beauty certainly helps.
It is also important to remember that many (perhaps even most) celebrities that people tend to idolize have had plastic surgery, and are not actually so naturally stunning. This is not to suggest, of course, that there is no natural beauty in Hollywood. However, it is to suggest that unless you’re prepared to look into some techniques at aboutplasticsurgery.com, you might not be able to become a clone of your favorite celebrity. And, do not be fooled when you hear some of these celebrities claiming that they haven’t ever had surgery…
One of the most popular rumors out there on this subject is that Kim Kardashian has had work done. However, the popular celebrity continues to insist that she has never had work done. Perhaps nobody told her, but there are a number of extremely telling before and after photos that certainly indicate that she has had no work done. There is no proof, of course, and for anyone to bother searching for it would be a criminal waste of time on a topic that doesn’t matter; but, do not be so sure that celebrity beauty is always attainable through natural means.
A photo of GOP presidential contender Mitt Romney from back in the day, when he was at private equity firm Bain Capital. (h/t @drgrist)